A talking therapist with no voice
As we approach the end of the week, I’ve found myself reflecting, not as a therapist, but as a human being who’s had, quite honestly, a rough time of it.
This week, I’ve been ill. And not the kind of “just a little sniffle and carry on” type. I actually lost my voice, which, as a talking therapist, is somewhat inconvenient. As someone who loves to talk in general, even more so!
It started with a full-on Monday, delivering a full-day training course. Tuesday followed with a packed caseload. But by Wednesday, that was it, I had no choice but to start cancelling things. CBT sessions, a long-overdue dinner with an old colleague, and a girlie night with one of my dearest friends and our daughters.
Dinners at home became quick and convenient (shoutout to M&S Tomato and Basil soup, surprisingly comforting), I’ve mostly lived under a blanket with a mini pharmacy, laptop by day and a Netflix series by night.
I’m not great at being unwell
Here’s something I’ve learned, I’m not a good ill person. I’m used to getting things done. I don’t like slowing down. I haven’t taken a sick day for myself in over five years. But this week, my body simply said Stop.
Although I worked from home planning and completing admin tasks, I also had to listen.
What softened the blow was my incredible support system. My youngest offered to make dinner for everyone. My eldest told me to rest and kindly pointed out that I work ‘too hard’. My husband kept the house in order. My dog became my personal hot water bottle. My mother-in-law checked in every day. And my best friends kept the love flowing via WhatsApp.
I already knew I was lucky, but this week has really consolidated that for me.
Practising what I preach
In CBT, we often talk about how our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours are all interconnected. When we’re unwell, physically or mentally, it’s so easy to fall into unhelpful thinking traps:
“I’m letting people down.”
“I should be able to push through.”
“I’m weak for needing rest.”
Sound familiar?
I caught myself having some of those thoughts, but I gently challenged them using the same tools I share with clients. I reminded myself:
Illness isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign I need care.
Resting isn’t lazy; it’s necessary.
I’m not letting people down by looking after myself, I’m modelling healthy boundaries.
Little CBT strategies that helped
If you’ve had a similar kind of week (and I’m guessing many of you have since it’s that horrid time of year), here are a few CBT-based strategies that helped me and might help you too:
Reframe the inner critic: Catch those harsh self-judgements and ask yourself, What would I say to a friend in this situation? Then offer that same compassion to yourself.
Gratitude check-ins: Even though I’ve felt rubbish and found myself crying at 4AM because I just couldn’t stop coughing, I made a point of noticing the small things. The warmth of my heated blanket, the soothing sounds of spa music, the quiet love in a simple text from a friend. These moments matter.
Permission to rest: Challenge productivity guilt. Sometimes, doing “nothing” is exactly what your mind and body need and to continue getting better and this weekend I plan to do just that!
Look at the the bigger picture: Missing a few days or needing to cancel things doesn’t undo your value or your relationships. People understand, often more than we think.
So, if you’re struggling too…
You’re not alone. Life happens. Bodies slow us down when our minds won’t. And that’s okay.
Take this weekend to reset if you can. Be kind to yourself, prioritise rest and remember, we don’t have to be perfect to be valuable, loved, or worthy.
If you’re struggling to manage stress, perfectionism, or just need someone to talk to, I offer a free 15- minute consultation call to see if CBT can help, just complete the booking form on my website.
